Are We in Heated Agreement?

Do you ever feel that during a heated debate you are actually arguing the same point? You are in agreement, or rather “heated agreement”. Why does that happen and how can you distinguish this from an real disagreement? Some years ago I came across the concept of “worldviews” while looking for guidance on managing conflict. The idea is that two different people can look at the same thing and see something different; or rather perceive something different. The apparent difference leads to the debate or argument, which if carried to its conclusion demonstrates the zones of both agreement and difference.  When this is done both protagonists can learn from each other and expand their worldviews and their common ground.  If the debate never takes place then their views remain polarised, no exchange happens, no learning takes place and the common ground does not grow. So is heated debate a good thing? Well it depends on the outcome you want.  If you want to improve, learn, change and expand your perspective then “yes”; if you want to change someone else’s opinion to match yours then “no”.  Improvement implies change; change imples learning; and learning implies an altered perspective.  So engaging in heated debate and achieving heated agreement is a sensible improvement strategy!